Category: humor
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Poezak : a Manifesto
Poetry has been afflicted with meaning for too long. Certainly, there have been stabs at meaninglessness—dada, language poetry, flarf—but without a sustaining podium, without a venue, these movements have flared and died like matches struck and cupped in the general dark of meaningfulness. But the podium has been awaiting us, brightly lit and stark. The…
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Confessions of a Non-Best-Selling Author
My overnight at the Convention Center started out about as uneventful as any other shift I had pulled over the past few weeks. I was already one month retired from the post office, in a funky college section of Boston called Allston, situated nearly dead center between Boston College and crosstown rival Boston University. Allston…
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The New Art of Book Making
I turn on the kettle for the cup of peppermint tea I make before every class. My laptop is on and mostly ready. While I wait for the water to boil I open up the zoom app, click join a meeting, then I type in the meeting ID that I wrote down on a post-it…
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Sign Beside the Stop Sign
Scrawled in rambling, crudely written letters it read “please don’t leave I love you”. And since one has to or should stop at a stop sign, maybe the writer thought that would make the beloved stop and think about what they might be doing. Maybe the stop sign was their special spot, where they first…
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Final Thoughts
The flash of the nuke’s impact enveloped Carl’s eyes to a point of near total blindness. It was all done now. The war had been finished without a true victor. His eyes settled enough for him to witness the world’s end before him. He breathed with a frightened quiver as he saw the shockwave from…
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Womb to Tomb Care — aka WTC
For the first time in history, not as presented before, I offer to all Americans Womb to Tomb Care. This is a brand new product where everyone can get everything they have always wanted in the very way they have always wanted it. WTC is the very innovative product that seems too good to be…
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Victuals Voyeurism
Watching a fellow shopper in the grocery store checkout aisle is a revelation of their palate and a hint of their health. I’m certain anthropologists have studied this communal phenomenon, the perusal of a fellow shopper’s victuals—you know, rubbernecking to see what the person in front of you is buying—because it’s a sociological foible we…
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The Greatest of All Time
The question I am most frequently asked is this: “How did you get to be the greatest of all time?” My response is always the same: “I didn’t get to be the greatest, I made myself the greatest.” No one gave it to me, I earned the title, I took it; I willed it to…
