Author: Lancelot Schaubert
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Dr. Ben Carson, Dr. Otto Octavious, and Dr. Strangelove Hang Signs
Somewhere in the middle of Missouri’s route 44 wasteland, Dr. Ben Carson, Dr. Otto Octavious, and Dr. Strangelove hang political signs for Dr. Carson’s campaign. They work on a big billboard featuring their faces and the faces of hundreds of other famous Doctors. It reads, Peace Is Our Profession. They were all, of course, hired for the job for the very same…
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Bilbo it up.
A few weeks back, Pat Rothfuss challenged us on twitter with the following: Get out there and Bilbo it up! Bare feet! Crispy leaves! Live a little! I want pictures too! pic.twitter.com/Bu8ckvUVl1 — Pat Rothfuss (@PatrickRothfuss) October 18, 2015
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Elon Musk’s Submarine Car: Why Build It?
In the authorized biography Elon Musk: Tesla, SpaceX, and the Quest for a Fantastic Future, Ashlee Vance highlights Elon’s purchase of the submarine car: Elon Musk paid $1 Million for the Lotus Espirit that Roger Moore drove underwater in The Spy Who Loved Me and wantes to prove that such a vehicle can be done. “Maybe we’ll make…
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Inkwell • from 54 poems at 27
Her house was underground in a town that ends in “A” her daddy was a preacher but the preachin’ wouldn’t pay when her brother tried to drown cause he didn’t wanna grey I tried for days to reach her but she took a week to say meet me in the roundabout in the town square…
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What they Chanted • from 54 poems at 27
Out of the sidewalks & into the streets Out of the sidewalks & into the streets Out of the sidewalks & into the streets If there’s no justice, gonna be no peace, until there’s no more killer police Hey hey, ho ho, these killer cops have got to go Hey hey, ho ho, these killer…
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In the River of Man • from 54 poems at 27
find me in the river of thought and event carried by the current of contemporary men see me stack their pebbles higher into my modern wall damming up their river into my waterfall genius ain’t meaningless its genus is in genes from us we can’t be me till me ain’t we original hearts make original…
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The Last Ship :: The Musical Gotham Deserved, But Not the One it Needs Right Now
Like all of my posts, this one is late. Not late like a marinade or summer come at last. Too late, in this case. Of course, I couldn’t have stopped the inevitable. Recap: Sting (the musician) wrote some songs (a musical) about his town (a shipyard) and it got him out of writer’s block. You…
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If Ever • from 54 poems at 27
If you never wake I’ll die and master beside manner just to be the first keeper you see on the other side And if you lose the faith I’ll study eighty tender reasons to wait Cause I’ll never go Never leave you alone you can’t chase away this chaser won’t outpace this pacer I’ll never…
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The Pot Hole
In the past few years, I’ve seen politicians found campaigns upon the legalization of Mary Jane, encountered books titled everything from Puff or Pass? to Pot, Inc., and heard some of the most logically unsound arguments for any position on any topic ever applied to why we should legalize NOW! People have loaded up on…
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Dead Guest Post: The Vote and The House
As many of you are out canvassing this month, today’s dead guest post comes from G.K. Chesterton: The Vote and The House by G.K. Chesterton (public domain) Most of us will be canvassed soon, I suppose; some of us may even canvass. Upon which side, of course, nothing will induce me to state,…
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JOHNNY CAGE OF MORTAL KOMBAT CALLS 911
“911 operator, what’s your emergency?” “I inhaled a fireball.” “Okay where are you?” “Oh god, I don’t know… I… I swallowed a fireball, what do I do?” “Stay calm.” “Okay, okay. BUT IT’S A FIREBALL.” “Right. Where are you?” “Liu Kang’s dojo. Our summer barbecue kind of got out of hand…” “Out of hand how?”…
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Can a Pastor Write Fiction?
Often in person or in emails I will get a pretty heartfelt question from some pastors. They want to know if it’s kosher for them to write mainstream fiction and still do pastoral ministry in the local church. “Can I be a pastor and still write fiction under my real name?” I received one of…