Mortarboard, indeed! Apt considering only one metaphor works for 2020 grads: We have scaled the WALL and seen the future.

The Leader’s WALL got built in 2020 through the mother of all GoFundMe campaigns after Covid-19 scared America witless. Marx erred: Capitalists wouldn’t sell rope to hang themselves. They’d sell mortar to build security.

When the Leader’s acolytes enticed funding by selling ad space on the WALL, the American way prevailed. WALLmart ponied up for naming rights. Big Oil, Tobacco and Pharma companies; gambling and porn sites; the NRA and resurrected Alt-right John Birch Society, KKK, and Fox News joined the party. Evangelicals paid to proselytize on the dark side to the rapists, pillagers and convicts the wall kept at bay.

Schools became different. As school shootings continued, one solution seemed ideal: Our emboldened Leader suggested WALLS around all American schools, even non-charter ghetto ones. Now, we’re surrounded by towers, camouflaged rather than ivory.

Do our WALLS give us moral high ground? Roman Scipio didn’t consider “a republic flourishing whose WALLS stand, but whose morals are in ruins.” He was a foreigner. Classmates, we have scaled our WALLS. Sound Jericho’s trumpets for the class of ’20. We ARE the WALL!