I wish I was a better man.
I would bargain for it
with Mephistopheles – clutch his
offered claw in mine.
With no irony, I would ask this
of God if I was only capable
of admitting to myself that…
that…
That it’s my fault.
All of it.
It was me from the start, wanting other
women, thinking of ways to convince you
that it wasn’t so bad for us to have
something on the side.
I’d laugh, after saying as much.
You’d laugh too after conquering your brief look of concern.

I planted the seed. You were the first to coax it,
to help it blossom, but I’d cheated a thousand times
in my mind.

And now, I can think only of you.