Filed under Cities

46 @ 23: The Investor’s Limerick (#28)

Once upon a time, I read that the perfect age for writing quality poetry is twenty-three.  Apparently most of T.S. Elliot’s stuff came out then, the rest having to do with non-poetic words. I realized January 19ththat I will turn twenty-four in three months, and since I started writing some poems before it’s too late: forty-six poems at twenty-three.  I’ll post each Friday until the last week of March, then I’ll post one a day until my birthday on April 30th.  Here’s number 28:

He took out five-million new pennies
Stuffed inside two giant tube-socks
He took them to Wall Street
The old guys did retreat
When he bought five-mil penny-stocks

46 @ 23: The Men God Made Mad (#30)

Once upon a time, I read that the perfect age for writing quality poetry is twenty-three.  Apparently most of T.S. Elliot’s stuff came out then, the rest having to do with non-poetic words. I realized January 19ththat I will turn twenty-four in three months, and since I started writing some poems before it’s too late: forty-six poems at twenty-three.  I’ll post each Friday until the last week of March, then I’ll post one a day until my birthday on April 30th.  Here’s number 30:

The novel men of New York
are the men that God made mad
For all their wrongs look noble
And all their virtues bad

See the senior gents from Florida
Are the gents of unsound mind
Their manners there are shocking
Their annoyances refined

But the younger guys from Cali
are the psychopathic freaks
Their minds filled up with plainness
Their bodies with mystique

Yet my sweeter men from Illinois
Will show up rather wise
They engineer their picnics
Their science? Improvise.

46 @ 23: The Ballad of the Silent City (#37)

Once upon a time, I read that the perfect age for writing quality poetry is twenty-three.  Apparently most of T.S. Elliot’s stuff came out then, the rest having to do with non-poetic words. I realized January 19ththat I will turn twenty-four in three months, and since I started writing some poems before it’s too late: forty-six poems at twenty-three.  I’ll post each Friday until the last week of March, then I’ll post one a day until my birthday on April 30th.  Here’s number 37 (block out some time for this one, it’s epic):

I.

Before the sounds of summer came
Among cold Rocky Mounts,
The City of the Silent grove
Was spun (by one account).

Before the cries of citadels
Besieged by bitter bands
The City of the Silent grove
Signed sonnets in the land

Decades on Amerigo’s coast,
Scores of centuries spent,
White horses crashed upon his shores,
On the Still City went.

Still City knew the Union
When brothers drove apart
She heard the shot heard round the world
Saw Chinook Ship Monsters haunt New World
And hushed her bleeding heart.

For the end of their world came long ago
When pirates stole their bay.
Like children of an afterbirth,
Now we who walk on sand, on earth
Came long after judgement day.

Yes the end of the world was long ago,
But not what the Chinook saw
For the whore on the seven hills will rot
By her own damned martial law Continue reading

The Quarterly Q&A Literation!

I love search engines. When I need a good laugh, I just read down through how people got to Literating & let the milk rocket out my nose. Some questions are serious too, so I’ve listed my favorites from the quarter & hope to answer them at least in part, if not with completely fabricated stories and made-up responses. Enjoy!

Free power of myth gift of the goddess summary?

Basically the gift of the goddess comes from the “motherly” side of God. Achilles was dipped in the river of Styx & so received immortality, but also it can come with a sort of weird sexual encounter. Because of this, it exists typically near the bottom of the cycle of the Hero’s Journey with the “Sacred Marriage.” This is either the At-one-ment with the father, the brother battle, crucifixion, or the sacred marriage. It’s the falling in love with the underworld, the affair with the goddess, the gift of divine help in the form of love and affection. Read up in Hero w/ 1000 faces.

The wise man’s fear discussion questions?

Here, though I’m surprised for as popular as it’s been that no one’s posted yet. It’s the quiet-elevator syndrome.

“So after, when he whispers “you love me. real or not real?”

Real.

What did Joseph Campbell believe?

That vague questions receive vague answers, or obscure ones like, “Burritos are good.”

No, smart aleck, did Joseph Campbell believe in God?

Oh, yea… not so much. Check it out.

What does Joseph Campbell say about vanity?

NICE! Vanity = the Anglo vision of the dragon, that hoarder of gold who taunts young warriors and maidens. It tempts as easily as greed and must be slain like Grendle in the deep, dark corners of this terrifying world. DO NOT chase after vanity, says Campbell. Continue reading

Antiques & Gold Mines

The 27th of February marked our first anniversary, and boy did we have fun. kiddo & I recently filled out the nielson TV survey. It went something like this:

  1. How many working TVs do you have in your home?
    one.
  2. Do you have cable, satellite or another paid programing?
    no.
  3. If you answered no, do you have rabbit ears or digital TV?
    no.

I then turned the page to the journal where you mark how often you watch TV. I started at thursday, put an X in the “TV was off” box, and extended its territory all the way down that page, onto the next page, and repeat for a week (minus the two DVDs we watched). Felt good.

I say that because when we look for a getaway, we’re usually looking for a hole in the ground – potentially a cave with good light – so that we can read and sleep and talk and write and eat. Nothing else.

Since our list of caves bordered on anemic this run around, we went down to Eureka Springs again, since it’s not far away. And that, as always, included a run to the Antique store. I still haven’t told you guys about how last time kiddo found a copy of the complete New Yorker archive, which retails for $100.00, priced @ $10, that I haggled down to 5 measly bucks. Yeah, we likey antiqui.

This one caught our eye, so we dropped in. We’ve been here before but we had forgotten how jammed-packed it is with stuff. To give you a taste, kiddo’s always looking for stuff she’s researched on Etsy like vintage cookie jars, bracelets, plates, furniture to flip, stuff like that. She got her office set up in the other gable, and it feels like a small-business-owner’s hideout or nest. She’s responsible for most of the awesome pictures on this blog that aren’t linked to another site. I, however, do research, and seeing as how my current novel starts out in 1897, I’m always looking for turn-of-the-century junk. Found old flintlock guns, pistols, weights, pocket-watches, books, and a grandfather clock from 1890 given to some civil war guy priced at, oh yeah, $20,000 dollars. Why?

‘Cause it still works.

We’re inside this store looking at first-edition comics, ring-holders, and coal-oil lamps when she tells me to turn around. The camera flashed me, (stupid indecent camera), and she started laughing.

When I looked in the viewfinder, I saw <— this picture, and realized that this lady (can’t remember her name), must have hoarded this stuff for decades, picking and bargaining, trading and haggling, grabbing and scrounging until she made a business of it.

Reminded me of my garage. I have got to clean that puppy out this spring.

Kiddo also found a first-run Gone With the Wind priced @ like $85.  That’s a HUGE find because Kiddo just read that exact. same. copy from our bookshelf back at home! (Found out my copy of Wise Man’s Fear is a FIRST EDITION too!)

Four handmade xylophones, three street musicians, two cappachinoes and a first edition X-Force later, we paraded out of there back to our little hole in the ground to read, relax, and chill. All in all, I count it a success & Kiddo nabbed some AWESOME shots that hopefully, soon, she’ll have on a blog somewhere.

Consider Eureka Springs Literated.

46 @ 23: Survival (#39)

Once upon a time, I read that the perfect age for writing quality poetry is twenty-three.  Apparently most of T.S. Elliot’s stuff came out then, the rest having to do with non-poetic words. I realized January 19ththat I will turn twenty-four in three months, and since I started writing some poems before it’s too late: forty-six poems at twenty-three.  I’ll post each Friday until the last week of March, then I’ll post one a day until my birthday on April 30th.  Here’s number 39:

Cold cuts me when I
step over my hill-
side splitting laughter
erupts a mountain over, a-
way to go, a good one, might be
freezing, though I’d grumble.

Heat beats me
burns me
sears my scars as I
fire up my fire-
place splitting logs between
all of us, a sign, a covenant, a monument to our metaphor, our
memory of this now-stumped for-
est quiconque se brûler
avec la mauvaise grammaire?

Can I can I can I get a
chance to see both Tame-
burlaine who conquered every ounce of cold of
heat until nothing’s left to feed us no-
thing left to keep us
warm.

If Wise Guys Ran the World: Why I’m Reading Harvard!

Some smart aleck suggested awhile ago for my Harvard Classic search, “Why not check the local library?”

I blew him off, thinking (1) it was too easy, (2) it didn’t show the support a community garners when they come together (3) it was, in the end, a waste of my time (4) the dude was a smart-a… leck and I couldn’t take him seriously. Turns out if wise guys ran the world, I’d already be reading the classics…

Now, with May approaching, I got desperate (I also had a conniption over how to spell “desperate” and “conniption”, still can’t find the latter… ah there we go. Two ‘n’s). I went on www.library.occ.edu/, searched for, you guessed it, “harvard classics” and low and behold! There is a God in Heaven! Jackpot! Cha-ching! Holy-moley-joey-we-got-ourselves-a-ringer-here!

Yeah. I feel dumb, but in an accomplished sort of way, maybe like Brittney Spears or one of the Olsen Twins. So, thanks to everyone who made a donation, and to my membership to the local library (ahem… ahem…) I will venture out to read ALL FIFTY-ONE BOOKS come May. Some of you may be wondering…

  • Is this stupid? Absolutely.
  • Is it impossible? Most likely.
  • How will you find any time to read all the rest of Rothfuss, Martin, McCarthy, King, and every other author you’ve wanted to read? I probably won’t.
  • Will we laugh or will it be fun to read and listen in? Good Lord, I hope so, otherwise somebody shoot. me. now (with an airsoft gun preferably. We try to keep it PG-12 here).
  • What authors to you intend to read and/or make fun of? All of them. No seriously, all the authors from the classics. This includes, but is not limited to, Benjamin Franklin, Charles Darwin, Walt Whitman, Freud, Robert Burns, Homer, Shakespeare, Bunyan, Augustine and Plato.
  • Will I get to see you ever again? No mom, I’ll probably disappear into an underground missile silo and call it “home” or “base” or “home base.” Then the Russians will come get me and torture me for my secret information… via tickling. PG-12! PG-12!
  • Will I be entertained at your expense? Yes. For you frequenters of YouTube, reality T.V., people watching at the local mall, and the Wire, you can point and laugh at me all you want. Feel free. You’re my intended audience.
  • Can I read along with you? Of  course, but it will probably kill you. I’ve lived a good life, but if your bucket list is still pretty full, you might want to reconsider. As I learned the hard way, yet again, you can find The Harvard Classics at your local library.
  • Will you die? Like the current death of one of the Fantastic Four, we won’t know until the end…

The State Motto Project

Check out the State Motto Project where 50 graphic designers from 50 states use their state motto in a design every weekday. Illinois, Kentucky, New York below:

46 at 23: Ulcers (#43)

Once upon a time, I read that the perfect age for writing quality poetry is twenty-three.  Apparently most of T.S. Elliot’s stuff came out then, the rest having to do with non-poetic words. I realized January 19th that I will turn twenty-four in three months, and since I started writing some poems before it’s too late: forty-six poems at twenty-three.  I’ll post each Friday until the last week of March, then I’ll post one a day until my birthday on April 30th.  Here’s number 43:

Pre-petptic
holes in my insides
drilled by the bits
of things
boss said

Jewelry shouldn’t
kill people like this.
Life has little wonders…  Continue reading

46 at 23: Blood in the Basin (#44)

Once upon a time, I read that the perfect age for writing quality poetry is twenty-three.  Apparently most of T.S. Elliot’s stuff came out then, the rest having to do with non-poetic words. I realized January 19th that I will turn twenty-four in three months, and since I started writing some poems before it’s too late: forty-six poems at twenty-three.  I’ll post each Friday until the last week of March, then I’ll post one a day until my birthday on April 30th.  Here’s number 44:

Flossed my gums tonight with bridge cable,
running steel braids through enamel grids.
I do it once a quarter, picketing
my bride, mother, aunts and overbearing
feminists from Jersey bent on cleaning
rot out from my crevices other days. Continue reading

Proper Usage: “Tool Bag”

Literating takes many forms, but most neglected of these is the proper usage category. Seldom do we break down our speech and ask ourselves, “did I really mean what I just said, and if I figure out both WHAT I’m saying and WHERE it came from, would I still agree with myself?”  Because of this, let’s take a look at the phrase “tool bag” and see if many of the young men using it mean what they say:

Tool [tool] – n. - a person representative of an industry who has no say in the industry; a poster-child used by a market as an advertising or popularity puppet to seduce the masses.

The word “tool” used in a derogatory way cropped up through the avenue of my generation (those spanning from roughly age nineteen to roughly age thirty). I believe the usage first applied to Carson Daily (though I have no evidence of this fact). Carson, as we all know, got his big break on TRL, something we all praised him for, but hoped he never left. As the market progressed, he grew arrogant, began taking on more and more responsibility through MTV and eventually graduated to dropping the ball on New Years. Thus, we refer to Carson Daily (and rightly so) as a “tool”, meaning that he became the face of MTV without having much say in the matter, that they used him as a linchpin for popularity, and if he had one of Noam Chomsky’s brain cells, he would have resigned before he signed up. Carson, thus, is a “tool”, i.e. a “puppet of the industry.”

Continue reading

46 at 23: Eighty Thousand (#45)

Once upon a time, I read that the perfect age for writing quality poetry is twenty-three.  Apparently most of T.S. Elliot’s stuff came out then, the rest ended up as prose. I realized January 19th that I will turn twenty-four in three months, and since then I started writing some poems before it’s too late: forty-six poems at twenty-three.  I’ll post each Friday until the last week of March, then I’ll post one a day until my birthday on April 30th.  Here’s number 45:

Five Million dollars cash money (they tell me) to build the new
Humane society complex in this town of
Eighty thousand strong, stronger every day.

Engines barked six A.M. sharp every morning
Waking up my wife and me to the tune of

Twenty backhoes, ten concrete trucks.
She grew up behind an airport; I faced freight train tracks -
Neither noise measures up.

Paper said pup populace skyrocketed to
Eighty thousand strong, stronger every day.

People dumped ‘em off, massive boxers,
Mastiffs in boxes barkin’ then
Ripped in half by semis blasting down highway 71.

Dead dogs in the middle of the road,
Dead dogs in the middle of the road,
Dead pups in the middle of the road,
Stinkin’ to high, high heaven.

Three weeks later she arrived wheezing, gaunt, dehydrated on our
Back porch. We ignored her nigredo-albedo fur, contrasted by our
Wet-green backyard.  Took weeks to concede, to
Let in that homeless dog, thanks to persistent pup-dumping Continue reading

Hidden Classics

Well between finding a volume hidden, finding three free online, and the mother lode, I’m honing in on having the series for the epic-reading-extravaganza-of-doom.  The four I found are briefed first, the others (from Mom & Dad Lang) are listed at the end (more to come!).  Two of these I found hiding amid the pile, the other two came free on my kindle:

  • Vol. 35. CHRONICLE AND ROMANCE, FROISSART, MALORY, HOLINSHEAD
  • Vol. 38. HARVEY, JENNER, LISTER, PASTEU
  • Vol. 49. EPIC AND SAGA
  • Vol. 21. I PROMESSI SPOSI

Here’s some quick summaries of each:

Vol. 35. CHRONICLE AND ROMANCE — “God has been gracious enough,” writes Froissart, “to permit me to visit the courts and palaces of kings, … and all the nobles, kings, dukes, counts, barons, and knights, belonging to all nations, have been kind to me, have listened to me, willingly received me, and proved very useful to me….  Wherever I went I enquired of old knights and squires who had shared in deeds of arms, and could speak with authority concerning them, and also spoke with heralds in order to verify and corroborate all that was told me.”

38 focuses on scientific papers – medicine and the like – of which I’m disinterested, despite the fact that my man Herodotus kicks off the whole thing.

There’s bound to be a handful of those, but Vol. Continue reading

Interesting Posts of Late

Each of these peaked my interest for these reasons: humor, advice, recent events, sales pitch on a classic.  Enjoy!

“I know this is a few weeks old, but since the Republican National Committee is in the headlines again, I feel obligated to post it. At the 0:50 mark on this video, RNC chairman Michael Steele answers the question “What’s your favorite book?”

STEELE: War and Peace. “It was the best of times and the worst of times.”

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! I will never not find this hilarious. (The best part is Tucker Carlson’s reaction to Steele’s answer; he’s clearly trying not to laugh.)”

– Posted by Michael Schaub
 
Brooke whimpered, “Oh no, oh no!” and crouched in front of Matthew who sat up, half-choking and -laughing.

 – From Diary of a Heretic.  I’ve posted it because that phrase “sat up, half- choking and -laughing” presents a fresh way to write a construction that became a habit or trademark of my writing lately, for whatever reason.  I have a main character doing half-onething and half-another a lot and the repetition is starting to annoy me in the rewrite.  (Careful with that particular blog, it’s not for your homeschooled jr. higher).

Continue reading