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Constructive Feedback on Your Blog : Relent

Once you’ve dissented against the norms in the blogging world, once you’ve clearly outlined how — exactly — you intend to help others, once you’ve focused on substance and earned the consent of readers who want you to contact them on a regular basis, and once you’ve fermented your own style and substance until the blog is authentically you and no one else, it’s time to relent to the constructive feedback.

It’s time to yield up some control to your readers.

Some of this happens through simply being teachable and admitting you’re wrong. Often.

Some of this happens through writing and reading and performing and recording more of whatever they want and respond well to.

Some of this happens by surveying them to see what else they like — if you’ve got a hundred or a thousand truly engaged audience members, then there’s a good chance that they all have something else in common other than their connection with you. What else do they have in common? And do you share that? If you do, add that to the list.

Featured Download: I’ve summarized this whole series into a checklist for you to consult before you start your blog or blog out in the open.

Whatever it is, it means receiving constructive feedback and doing something about it.

It’s a simple rule, but for instance it showed me that I needed to close my comments after a day. None of my readers interact with me in the comments. They did about five years ago, but that has changed — unless a piece goes viral, I almost never get comments on my site. I asked many, many regular readers about this and the consensus was that they preferred interacting via email.

So I bucked all of the advice in the blogging world, turned off comments, and encouraged people to email me more.

And you know what?

People started subscribing in droves. And they interact more with me through the inbox than they ever did on the site.

If your readers and audience collectively push you in a direction, relent.

Featured Download: I’ve summarized this whole series into a checklist for you to consult before you start your blog or blog out in the open.


Be sure to share and comment. And subscribe.

Quick note from Lance about this post: when you choose to comment (or share this post with your friends) you help other readers just like you.

How?

Well, see, your comments & sharing whisper a few things to those who come after you:

The first is that this site is a safe place to speak up & stay curious. That it’s civil. That discussion is encouraged. That there’s no such thing as a stupid question (being a student of Socrates, I really and truly believe this). That talking to one another and growing together is more important than anything we could possibly publish. That the point is growing in virtue and growing together and growing wise. That discovery is invention, deference is originality, that we all can rise together. The only folks I’m going to take comments down from are obvious jerks who argue in bad faith, don’t stay curious, or actively make personal attacks. And, frankly, I’d rather we talk here than on some social media farm — I will never show ads and the only thing I’m selling anywhere on the site or my mailing list is just the stuff I make.

You’re also helping folks realize that anything you & they build together is far more important than anything you come to me to read. I take the things I write about seriously, but I don’t take myself seriously: I play the fool, I hate cults of personality, and I also don’t really like being the center of attention (believe it or not). I would much rather folks connect because of an introduction I’ve made or because they commented with one another back and forth and then build something beautiful together. My favorite contributions have been lifelong business and love partnerships from two people who have forgotten I introduced them. Some of my closest friends NOW I literally met on another blog’s comment section fifteen years ago. I would love for that to happen here — let two of you meet and let me fade into the background.

Last, you help me revise. I’m wrong. Often. I’m not embarrassed to admit it or worried about being cancelled or publicly shamed. I make a fool out of myself (that’s sort of the point). So as I get feedback, I can say, “I was wrong about that” and set a model for curious, consistent learning, and growing in wisdom. I’m blind to what I don’t know and as grows the island of my knowledge so grows the shoreline of my ignorance. It’s the recovery of innocence on the far end of experience: a child is in a permanent state of wonder. So are the wise: they aren’t afraid of saying, “I don’t know. That’s new: please teach me.” That’s my goal, comments help. And I read all reviews: my skin’s tough, but that’s not license to be needlessly cruel. We teach one another our habits and there’s a way to civilly demolish an idea without demolishing another person: just because I personally can take the world’s meanest 1-star review doesn’t mean we should teach one another how to be crueler on the internet.

For three magical reasons — your brave curiosity, your community, & my ignorance:

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