I used to be a gamer.
By “gamer” mean more than playing video games. Travis Sweeney helped build my first computer to run Half Life 2 and CS2. That was before Portal , before the zombie mods that grandfathered endless zombie mode in Modern Warfare. I attended LAN parties. For one whole semester, I was nocturnal. I tried the free version of WOW, but couldn’t afford the monthly fee (thank God). I trace my gaming heritage back to Super Mario, Sonic, Zelda and even my friend Andy’s Oddysey which ran things link pong and my dad’s Commodore. We frequented arcades for the stand-up joystick version of X-Men, Pac Man and Marvel VS. Capcom.
Twas more than Perfect Dark, Time Splitters and Earthworm Jim.
Twas an early life of digital drug sampling.
Flash forward to the month before college when I stood before a room full of old men I respected and gave my word to assert myself rather than ride through on the coattails of my own intellect. Four weeks into my freshman year and I gave up my gravity gun, my scroll of Icarian flight and my axe with cleave-edge (thank you, Baldyr’s gate). It was time to swap out my shorts for pants. Time to leave the endless realm of Morrowind.
When Oblivion came out a year later, I wanted to witness the gameplay. Morrowind: Elder Scrolls III remains my favorite of all time. The elder scrolls series combines the best parts of Diablo 2, Final Fantasy and Grand Theft Auto. They custom-fit Morrowind for a young storyteller. Oblivion lived up to the hype, but I abstained. Over the years I stopped watching G3, but I’ve always been surround with guys who watch it. When SKYRIM: Elder Scrolls V came out, I knew.
No, I didn’t play. That’s like asking a former crack addict to take a sniff of whatever you’re freebasing. I did, however, watch. Yes, I was impressed. The makers created beauty in this game, blending the realism of the MWF series with the cartoonish feel of WOW. The physics engine improved on Oblivion (if that can be done) and made it imperative to utilize things like fall damage and to avoid mechanical traps. For the latter, you must not cross the wrong line or Indi-Jones-style boulders will chase you down a mountainside. No cheesy magic graphics. No cut scene. Just some big friggin’ rocks you gotta run from before they crush you. (I wrote those last two words with a Russian accent, for any keeping score). For the former, I watched Charlie one-shot a troll.
The game occupies the old northern Nordic island. Dragons return. They spawn randomly, even to the frustration of the player. The Draconic race, after all, likes the taste of horses – even recently purchased horses. The Elder Scrolls team added a series of shouts – Draconic phrases that hold unique power. Unlock a shout with the soul of a dragon you slay, and you open whole new sets of magical possibilities. One of them reforms the classic Jedi force-push and turns it into Dark Phoenix concussive power.
There’s Charlie getting his wood elf butt chased up a mountain for the fifth time by this frost troll. He climbs to the steepest point, turns around and shouts in the troll’s face. Of course the magic hurt it, but the force pushed the troll off the mountainside and it tumbled until it crashed into the crags below. Charlie flexed the freckles on his ginger cheeks into a grin.
They fixed the lock pick mini game, increasing realism – blinding the guts of the mechanism. They also customized the skill list – you hone skills for catered abilities. Crafts come with the classes: tan leather or work a forge. I’d buy it if I did that sort of thing anymore…
I contrast Skyrim against Modern Warfare 3 which I did play over break with my step-cousin-in-law. Don’t get me wrong – the story’s amazing, the gameplay beat MW2, the graphics and destructible environs ensare you. That’s the problem. The game is too good. I have the same problem with the Hi-Def/Blu Ray combo. I want to feel fooled. I don’t want to feel like I’m looking out a window and watching, for instance, Hotel Rwanda. The movie shifts from transforming power to post-traumatic stress at that point. Like pornography – the mind cannot chemically tell the difference.
I recognize the value of the medium as a storytelling tool. I get it. That’s why I played the games I played. Here’s the thing about stories – all good stories come to an end save one: history. We do not author history. We live mortal lives, our stories come to an end. The easiest way to become a midlist writer or TV show is to write a story that’s serialized and doesn’t end, that drags on until every character and scenario runs dry. That’s how you force Fonzi to jump the shark – begin without the end in mind. Video games need endings too. Outside story endings, video games create no new medium. They create alternate realities. It’s not fantasy. It’s virtual reality – literally.
I don’t want to experience shooting another human being. The part in MW3 where you have to sneak up behind a child African soldier and slit his throat was WAY WAY WAY too much. I quit. I’ve sworn off first-person shooters. I’m done dehumanizing people and glorifying violence. What would my African friends think if they watched me play that crap? The Rabbi was right – those who live by the sword, die by the sword. That’s not the way I wanna go.
After I reemerged from the gaming world one last time, my cinematographer friend said, “It’s sad. When the Modern Warfare trailer came out, the comments were ‘looks like a bunch of wives won’t see their husbands for three months.’ People divorce over this stuff.” He talked about sociological studies on video game addictions. Here’s a couple:
I used to be a gamer video game addict, but I’ve been clean for seven years. Take off your shorts and put on some pants, people.
(pictures linked to originals)
Great post thanks. I really enjoyed it very much. You have an excellent blog here.
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The problem, as you’ve implied, is not in the video games, but in the addiction. The same is true with virtually everything else. For some it may be sports. For some it could be reading. It could be experimenting in the kitchen until you create the perfect cookie. It could be the draft-revision-draft-revision cycle of writing. Anything can become an obsession, and that’s when the problem begins. Sure, other things may have inert problems (re: slitting a child soldier’s throat, etc.), but their presence doesn’t necessarily ruin the medium. That’s why spiritual maturity should be sought, getting to the midset of Paul in Romans 14. (Of course, I doubt Paul would play video games, but that’s neither here nor there.) There’s a definite fine line, though, and if we’re causing ourselves to stumble and/or falter, then we should gouge out our own eyes and whatnot.
What’s more, entertainment is an absolute must. There are plenty of studies showing how breaks and escapism improve productivity and efficiency. Unfortunately, many people lack the maturity to function properly, and therefore become addicts to various things. I have no problem with video games. I have a problem with undisciplined people. It seems like you have taken giant steps forward in self-discipline, and that’s great. If only more people took up the call to arms…
Great post.
(Note: I’ve never played a MW game, but I’ve put around 35hrs into Skyrim since 11/11, just over an hour per day, and I’m mesmerized by it.)
I like this:
“Fantasy is a desire which, through prohibition, seeks an unreal but realized object.”
That could be bad (pornography) or good (Aslan/Harry Potter) but I think it’s true either way.
Thanks for the encouragement. I always find with things like this that it’s best not to avoid or put aside the question too soon, too easily. It helped me to, as Lewis quoted, “ask the question and wait for an answer.” I didn’t like the answer at the time, but in truth, it was probably best.
Exactly. My thinking is that if we avoid pop culture then our interaction with the world will likely be highly inefficient and likely nonproductive. And if we want to impact the world and the people in it, then we have to meet them where they’re at in life and treat them like something other than a project. The more we remove ourselves from culture, the more irrelevant we become. I’m not saying that American culture is Right and True (that’s absurd), and I’m not saying that we should be of the world, but we should definitely be in it, spreading the love and power of the gospel. We’ve just got to be careful. And that’s where knowing our own personal boundaries comes in to play.
That’s a great quote by Lewis, but I’d amend it to “ask the question and seek an answer.” Waiting is too passive for my likes, though patience is definitely much needed.
Good stuff.
Lewis was responding to someone who would ask a question and walk away. He’d agree with you.
As for the in/of dichotomy, I don’t know if those terms are helpful anymore for talks about culture. I’m far more interested in creating culture – of being a boulevarde who tries to follow the Rabbi Jesus. I realize that by existing, I help contribute to culture – because of that, I’m very interested in taking an active (even aggressive) role in my contributions.
Thus my hatred of Christian enterprise. It’s so antithetical to the goodness of Jesus in so many ways, I don’t know where to start in my critique. Instead, I’d rather write a good novel that the average dude and dudette can pick up and enjoy. Or screenplay. Or whatever. I’m interested in creating good culture, not just existing in whatever happens to be around me at the time.
For video games (the topic that started our discussion) that means writing a damn good story that people will enjoy and that will help them be better people – a story that eventually ends.
Ha! I got you there. Lifeway (and just the entire “Christian” genre) riles me up quite a bit. Sure, they provide great resources, but at what cost?
You make an excellent point. Creating culture sounds much better than engaging culture or going counter-culture. I like it.
You are far more generous than I – I don’t know if I can personally call their resources “great”. After reading John Milton and Lewis, I’m beginning to think we teach our undergrads what people used to learn in grade school. People may not be used to reading Homer in the third grade, but that doesn’t mean they’re incapable.
My mentor, Doug Marks, said “I’m interested in a creating a christocentric superculture, one that the world would applaud.” Look at Milton, Rowling, Handle, Mozart, Michellangelo, Chaucer and you’ll find all kinds of people who both tried to follow Jesus and created something impressive. I think it’s not only doable. I’m now asking the question: where else has it been done?
“Christocentric superculture?” I thought that has happened before. Like The British Empire. Or are you meaning academically segregating out Christians who made art? Could you clarify that for me? Just curious. I get nervous when people say superculture, sounds elitist and unfortunately creates the echoes of jackboots. If you know what I mean.
I have a friend, well I used to…but this person has been lost to World of Warcraft. It is rather alarming in a way. He went from an outgoing person who engaged in a lot of civic improvement activities and fun stuff like BBQs and music in the parks. We have all seem him become a person who works, and plays WOW. That is about it. He even told us that if we want to talk to him we have to call on his commmute home from work!
No no, not imperialistic crap like Britain, Constantine or some theocracy like rome. I knew logan would catch my meaning so I dared to use the term with him, between you and I, I’d probably say “We need more good art, good writing, good engineering – good creativity all around – from people who try to follow the Rabbi Jesus.” I’m not an elitist – I abhor elitism and fundamentalism in any form. Jackboots?
Sorry about that friend of yours. I know of a couple. Of course, some of my friends might say the same of me and writing, but the reality is I’m a bit more introverted than I used to be. Coming from such an extreme extrovert, that was a shock to several of them. However, I deeply sympathize and it’s a hard thing to deal with.
May he wake up to reality, sis.
Hey, I love Milton, and I am a Jew. Blake, not so much. Not the material, more the style.
That last post was unclear. Okay, I like Milton’s writings even though I am not Christian. However, for some reason Blake leaves me cold.
That’s exactly what I’m getting at! Why write for Christian audiences? That to me seems elitist, fundamental and altogether hypocritical. You’re a Jew, yet you can appreciate Milton’s contribution. That means he did great work. I’m interested in jesus-followers doing good work for the pleasure that good work brings rather than engaging in crafts they have no business pursuing alongside such a limited audience.
I’m with you when it comes to Blake. Can’t get into him yet. Chesterton? Now that was a man. If he would have threw away his pistols and gave more money away, he might have been perfect.